forgiveness

First forgive

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By Snow

We have been in our new home over three months now, more than a quarter of a year! During the construction process, it often felt like we would never get here, and now we have been here for months.

I’ve mentioned before that this move has been challenging. Multiple days a week, the builder or their sub-contractors are here fixing things that should have been right long before we moved in – like having a front door that properly opens, shuts, and locks. We are also experiencing unexpected expenses of contracting people on our own to get things to where they need to be.

However, JC and I choose as best we can to focus on the blessing of finally being together under one roof as a family. We also love our home and our land, both of which really belong to God. He’s just letting us borrow and tend to them for a little bit. One of us will sometimes falter and be blinded by the negative, but this is when the other provides a reminder to focus on the blessings.

My beloved bride recently heard a strong message from the Holy Spirit – and that is, we must forgive the builder. I am so grateful she shared this with me, because she is absolutely right.

My internal voice said, “I should have thought of this, as the spiritual leader.” This type of negativity will sneak into my thoughts, and I have to be on guard about it. Unfortunately, I don’t always catch it, but this time I did. It doesn’t matter what vessel God uses to convey His will, all that matters is that we hear and obey.

The ability to forgive is a wonderful gift from Jesus. While I will sometimes resist doing so, I always feel so free after doing it. You see, harboring a grudge against a person or a company doesn’t really hurt them. It hurts you.

My Dad completely abandoned our family when I was 16 years old. For years, I held intense anger against him. I didn’t want to hear anything about him, and I certainly didn’t want to be compared to him in any way. Even on his good qualities, which I could no longer see at that time due to my pain at what he did to us.

I reacted sharply against my Mom when she complimented me in some way as being similar to him. I told her I was nothing like him at all and never would be. She responded, “Of course you’re like him sometimes. He’s part of you, just like I am. I loved him, and you have good parts of him that I love in you, too.” This from the woman hurt more by his actions than anyone else.

After Dad died, I eventually realized that I needed to forgive him. I did so, and it felt like a burden lifted. This was before I was even saved, so I didn’t fully understand what was going on. All I knew was, I felt so much better by letting go of my anger against him.

Me and Dad (Image Credit: Mom)

Forgiving my father also reclaimed the good memories I had with him. For years, those memories had been colored and distorted with his subsequent poor choices. But he did love me, and he did enjoy those times together like I did. Forgiving him let me realize that.

So, yes, I forgive our builder. Not for their sake, but for ours.

“When you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.”
Mark 11:25 NLT

Saul and David: A pair of kings

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By Snow

David is one of the most interesting figures of the Bible, and JC and I could (and, Lord willing, will) explore him in dozens of posts over the years. Today, I just want to take a brief look at an interesting parallel in the kingships of Saul and David.

In 1 Samuel 18, King Saul, out of jealousy, decides he wants David, his greatest and most loyal soldier, dead. The below verse describes one of the ways he tries to arrange this:

“One day Saul said to David, ‘I am ready to give you my older daughter, Merab, as your wife. But first you must prove yourself to be a real warrior by fighting the LORD’s battles.’ For Saul thought, ‘I’ll send him out against the Philistines and let them kill him rather than doing it myself.'”
1 Samuel 18:17

After initially declining the offer, David eventually agrees instead to marry King Saul’s younger daughter, Michal. King Saul decrees that David must kill 100 Philistines to earn her hand. The ploy fails, for David returns, having killed 200 Philistines (as described in 1 Samuel 18:18-27). King Saul’s behavior towards David becomes increasingly erratic until he is obsessed with pursuing and killing him.

David, for his part, still considers King Saul anointed by God. In the midst of being hunted, David twice has the opportunity to kill King Saul, yet chooses not to do so (as described in 1 Samuel 24:3-7 and 1 Samuel 26:7-9). These are remarkable acts of restraint.

David even kills the man who claims to have killed King Saul when bringing news of his death in a battle against, you guessed it, the very same Philistines that he hoped would kill David (as described in 2 Samuel 1:6-16).

Credit: JC

David becomes king, but many years later, he stumbles. He commits adultery with Bathsheba, who becomes pregnant. When he is unable to make it look as if the forthcoming child is of her husband, Uriah, King David then decides Uriah, a loyal solider, must die.

“So the next morning David wrote a letter to Joab and gave it to Uriah to deliver. The letter instructed Joab, ‘Station Uriah on the front lines where the battle is fiercest. Then pull back so that he will be killed.’ So Joab assigned Uriah to a spot close to the city wall where he knew the enemy’s strongest men were fighting.”
2 Samuel 11:14-16

King David has essentially ordered the same fate for Uriah as King Saul once planned against him. Except this time, because David’s version is more insidious than that of Saul, the plan succeeds, and Uriah indeed falls. King David has now added murder to adultery in his list of sins. I am leaving out a lot here, but things soon begin to fall apart for him. He takes Bathsheba as his wife, repents and asks forgiveness from God, and their baby dies.

King David and Bathsheba have another child, Solomon, who goes on not only to succeed him as king, but to be in the bloodline of Joseph (see Matthew 1:6-16), adopted father of Jesus – fulfilling prophecy of the Messiah being from the line of David (Ezekiel 37:24).

What to make of all this?

One of the misconceptions I had about the Bible before I was saved was that most of the people in it were perfect and led exemplary lives. Of course, this myth was shattered early on in my journey. In the Bible, there is only one perfect human, Jesus Christ. The rest are flawed, like us.

The Lord considered David a “man after his own heart” (1 Samuel 13:14), yet even David went on to break multiple of His commandments. Those of us who follow Jesus also aspire to be after His own heart. We want to be Christlike, but we all sin.

Every day we make mistakes, yet every day God still loves us and still uses us to fulfill His plan and His glory. This is not because we are deserving, but because of His grace and because of His Son, who died for our sins such that we be made right with God.

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”
Romans 8:28

One last thing before I go. I want to point you over to a beautiful post by JC over on Wounded Butterflies, where she begins telling more of her story as a survivor of abuse. Please read what she has to say: Nobody Knew, Yet Everybody Knew.

Thank you, may Jesus bless you, and goodnight.

How to avoid losing to a defeated enemy

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Credit: JC

By Snow

We know that Jesus has already won the war against Satan, the enemy (John 16:33). We, therefore, fight from victory against that enemy.

Though Jesus has won the war, we can still lose individual battles against the enemy. Jesus provides His followers with many blessings, including joy (John 15:11) and a life abundant (John‬ ‭10:10‬). Only we can give up these blessings by letting the enemy infiltrate our heads and control our thoughts. Never give up the blessings of Jesus to the enemy.

How do we combat the enemy so we don’t lose these individual battles?

Your first and foremost weapon is prayer. Call on Jesus, call on the Father, call on the Holy Spirit. If you are a follower of Jesus, you literally have the power of the Holy Spirit within you. The same power that raised Jesus from the dead. The same power that has already defeated the enemy. Trust and call upon this eternal energy.

What is better than you praying? Two people praying. Enlist another Christian or two to assist you. In turn, you can assist them with their personal battles against the enemy as well. There is a power in two or three. I have seen it time and again over the last two years since I was saved.

“I also tell you this: If two of you agree here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you. For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.”
Matthew 18:19-20

What other weapons do you have? Another formidable piece of your arsenal is God’s Holy Word, what Ephesians 6:17 calls, “the sword of the Spirit”! Are you reading the Bible every day? God’s Word is not something to be glanced at for an hour on Sundays, but to be read and absorbed each day of your life.

Remember, Satan is an expert on Scripture (Luke 4:9-11; Matthew 4:5-6). How will you defeat his twisting of truth if you never read the Bible on your own? Read it. Study it. Learn about it. Experience it as a living document.

Praying and reading will tremendously help, but the enemy can and will still attack you. This is why you must be mindful of your thoughts (2 Corinthians 10:5). When you feel yourself going negative, stop. Just stop. Breathe. Capture the thoughts and dispose of them, using the powerful name of Jesus.

If you are being pulled into sin, put the brakes on. Pray. Text a friend. Read a verse. Whatever it takes.

And if you do sin, don’t give up. All is not lost. Don’t plummet into even more sin. Instead, go to God and ask forgiveness. Repent. He forgives you. His Son died such that all of your sins would be forgiven. Begin anew with a blank slate (Psalm 51:7-8).

Yes, the enemy fights from defeat. However, the enemy wants to make you as miserable as possible – by either keeping you away from Jesus altogether or stealing the joy and other gifts Jesus provides you.

The enemy is cunning, but can only defeat you if you let him. You have Jesus on your side – the mightiest spiritual warrior there ever was – and the full strength of Heaven’s Armies.

The above is all well and good for those who are saved, but what if you don’t yet know Jesus? Then make today the day you come to him. What is holding you back?

Do you have to be perfect to know Jesus? No, certainly not. I sure wasn’t perfect, as has been well documented here.

Jesus accepts you for who you are. Right now. This very instant. He died to save the very worst version of you.

No matter your past, Jesus will walk with you – but you have to take the first step.

Will you be perfect after you know Jesus? Alas, no. I can report that I and all other believers still stumble, make mistakes, and sin every day. However, when you truly let Jesus into your heart, your life will forever be different as He shares His blessings with you.

In many ways, your life will begin anew when you accept Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17). You will see with new eyes. Experience life with new feelings. The enemy doesn’t want you to know Jesus. What better reason to run to Jesus right now and accept His gifts of salvation and eternal life?

If you don’t yet know Jesus but feel ready to do so, why not take a moment to surrender your heart to Him?

Pray with me:

Heavenly Father,

Please forgive my sins. I accept Your Son, Jesus, into my heart as my Lord and Savior. He came to Earth as a human and died on the cross such that my sins could be forgiven, and I would have eternal life. Your power resurrected Him and has already defeated the enemy. Thank You for giving that same power to me. Please lead and guide me to a new life of abundance, full of Joy and Peace.

In the blessed name of Jesus I pray.

Amen

These are words and whether you use these or your own variation, repeating them is not some kind of magic incantation that grants you eternal salvation.

No, you must believe and live the words. Breathe the words. When you do accept Christ, be forewarned the spiritual battles have only just begun. Seek out fellow believers for help growing in the faith. Don’t know anyone to help? Then contact JC and me. We are here for you.

Be sure to check out our sister blog, Wounded Butterflies, and JC’s latest post, “When You Forgive and God Punishes,” in which she explains why it is so important for us to forgive others.

Thank you for reading. May Jesus bless you as He has blessed me.

“Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared. In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.”
Ephesians 6:11-18

Dear God, please forgive me

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For background on today’s post, please see previous posts where JC has shared her story – including “Spiritual Abuse” and “The Cycle of Trust.”

Credit: JC

By JC

Dear God,

Please forgive me. I am sorry. I am sorry that I did not trust You during my storm.

Funny thing is that I know the story about the disciples and You sleeping in the boat, commonly known as “Jesus Calms the Storm”:

“Then Jesus got into the boat and started across the lake with his disciples. Suddenly, a fierce storm struck the lake, with waves breaking into the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. The disciples went and woke him up, shouting, ‘Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!’ Jesus responded, ‘Why are you afraid? You have so little faith!’ Then he got up and rebuked the wind and waves, and suddenly there was a great calm. The disciples were amazed. ‘Who is this man?’ they asked. ‘Even the winds and waves obey him!'”
Matthew 8:23–27

I read your Word everyday so I know this story. And yet, for a long time, I have doubted Your control over the storm I am in. I never said it that way or thought about it that way, but that is what I did. While I never doubted that You love me, I was not hearing from You. Despite my faithful prayers, the many times I cried and begged for an answer, You were silent. I felt like the disciples – scared and crying out, “Lord, where are You?”

I prayed to You, Lord, asking for You to bend me and break me to Your will. I kept handing over the situation to You, reminding myself of Philippians 4:6: “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.”

But then I would take the situation back from You:

Lord, You are not moving, I do not see anything improving for months and months, despite my prayers and fasting and my broken heart. I do not understand, I know You love me. I have been a Christian for over a decade, so I know what to do when prayer goes unanswered–Fast, ask God if there is unconfessed sin in my life, check if what I am asking is in line with Scriptures, talk to Godly people, and sometimes understand no answer is an answer.

I was trying everything just to survive.

Then, I was listening to K-LOVE at work this week and I heard this: God waits until you truly surrender to Him. Then, He kindly says, “My child, I was just waiting for you to be done.”

That hit me hard. I was trying to do this or that. While I was praying and fasting and removing sins from my life, I had not fully surrendered to You. It was unintentional, I believed I had surrendered. But, what I was saying was “God, please fix this . . . just not that way please.”

I was not fully surrendered to You. I then started praying, “Lord, please do whatever You want. I no longer care. Just please do something.” [I am not recommending this exact prayer, as I had a bad attitude.]

I spent a few days praying this and inviting the Holy Spirit to work on my bad attitude.

Then, You moved.

And You moved in a big way.

I am sorry I did not trust You. I am sorry I kept handing over my burdens and then taking them back. I am sorry I did not fully surrender to You.

Thank you, God. You have taught us so much. May we never forget these lessons:

  • You provide (Philippians 4:19)
  • Trust in You (Proverb 3:5)
  • Be still (Psalm 46:10)
  • “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything” (Philippians 4:6)
  • Rejoice in the Lord always (Philippians 4:4)
  • Owe no one a thing, except love (Romans 13:8)
  • Love Jesus first
  • Seek first the Kingdom of God (Matthew 6:33)
  • If it’s His will, He will
  • “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them” (Romans 8:28)
  • “You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good” (Genesis 50:20)
  • And nothing can separate us from Your love (Romans 8:38-39)

Amen

Doctor Lois Evans, beloved bride of Texas-based pastor and author Doctor Tony Evans, went Home on December 30. Doctor Evans on January 5 provided a poignant sermon as a tribute to her, embedded below or available directly on YouTube. JC notes, “He talks about being close to God, how you can hear and see Heaven when you stay close to Him. She trusted Him in her death. We must always stay close to Him and trust Him no matter what.”

 Credit: Tony Evans (YouTube)